Shunning Shelter
by LuvEwan
Summary: After the tumultuous mission to Eume'Li, Knight Ullo Tirr must confront a life he now barely recognizes. Meanwhile, Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan search for balance to a connection that has been shattered by revelation. Sequel to 'A Change of Plans'.
1. Default Chapter

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Shunning Shelter

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A Sequel to 'A Change of Plans'

By LuvEwan

Rating: PG-13

Main Characters: Qui-Gon Jinn

Obi-Wan Kenobi

Ullo Tirr (Original Character)

Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me, nor do I make any profit.

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THANKS TO all of you who read and replied to 'A Change of Plans' and gave me the support needed to write this sequel. My replies to your comments from the last chapter of that story are at the bottom of this chapter. Thanks again.

After the tumultuous mission to Eume'Li, Knight Ullo Tirr must confront a life he now barely recognizes. Meanwhile, Master Qui-Gon Jinn and his apprentice search for balance to a connection that has been shattered by revelation.

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It wasn't real.

That was the only explanation. He had slowly and carefully catalogued the possibilities, words full of blame and sour, bitter dejection--even horror flashing through his mind. His stomach was roiling and a thickness was layering fast in his throat.

But it couldn't _be his fault._

No. Because only a few hours before, nothing was out of place. Things were as they always had been. It was logical that they would continue down that avenue of predictability and stability, the same landscape surrounding him.

Untouched. Undefiled.

He had promise. That's what Master Yoda had told him. It was the spot of brilliant sunshine in his panorama. Nothing could cloud that radiance. For years, it was a source of warmth.

He didn't want to be held responsible.

He didn't want to be in the dark.

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Jedi Knight Ullo Tirr stood in the doorway to his quarters. He knew it must be the same for everyone, when returning from an off-planet assignment. The Temple was a polished stone among the ever-increasing pile of grit that was polluting Coruscant, the galaxy.

Hells, even the air carried a clean, sweetened scent.

The same could not be said for the various worlds a Knight traveled while pursuing a mission. Take Eume'Li, for example…

Ullo's breath quickened at the thought. He sealed his eyes and pictured a kata, going through the movements, every step choreographed and measured.

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Get a hold of yourself, for stars' sake. With that chastisement, Ullo opened his eyes. Sharp emerald trailed the length of the shadowed room. _Home._ _Crisp, stainless, orderly home. _Far different from the tangled mess he struggled through on Eume'Li. To reassume one's life after such an ordeal was difficult enough, but to do so while encompassed by such perfection was nearly impossible.

Here dwelled some of the most battle-hardened souls in the Universe, but you could never tell by the shining walls and serene meditation areas. The Temple demanded its inhabitants to reflect that calm.

So it was with a heavy heart that Ullo stepped through the threshold into the common room.

Laying on the table was a stack of holonotes for an involved research project. At the start of his last mission, his mind was crowded with ideas and half-composed paragraphs. But now, looking down, that eagerness was drained from him. It seemed a nearly foreign notion, to devote so much time, such energy to an essentially needless endeavor.

Something inside him rebelled against the thought.

He glanced around at the deadened apartment, awash in gray due to the covered windows.

There was time for a quick dinner before bed. And he really should eat.

For a moment, he was stalled, studying the couch, the paintings on the wall, the rotted fruit on the kitchen table. And then Ullo realized he wasn't seeing anything at all.

()

Obi-Wan stood at the mirror, watching as the steam dispersed around him, leaving his face flushed and the glass fogged. He was never one to linger in the shower, at least not when he had other pressing matters to attend to. The apprentice had to admit that delivering the Eume'Li mission report fell under that category, as well as another: 'Things he deeply, deeply did not want to do'.

So he indulged himself the few extra minutes. He lathered his hair and body at leisure, careful of the muscles still sore from his recent illness.

Now, waiting for his reflection to surface through the dense air, Obi-Wan was refreshed. But the jetting streams of warm water couldn't quite cleanse the film from his skin. The jungle's shadow clung to him, in the lifeless eyes of the desiccated animal corpses, the sweat, the wind coarsened by dust.

And, most of all, the devastating pain that twisted his Master's features, when it was revealed to him his own Padawan's mistrust.

Obi-Wan had not witnessed for himself this scene. Yet his dreams during recuperation provided him the image and though it was conjured, it didn't seem dramatized.

The eyes swept downward, the deep lines chiseled into his once-proud face. Beneath that web of sorrow and grief lay what had been there from the beginning.

Disappointment.

Obi-Wan had tried to apologize. Qui-Gon would not hear it. Some wrongs were too colossal to be sated with mere words.

Obi-Wan wondered if any repentance would ever be enough, or if this breach between them, this ugly thing that kept him locked away while his Master waited, would close.

A tiny voice whispered that Qui-Gon cared, offering memory of their reunion in the medical center as proof. But Obi-Wan was skeptic that that rapture would have remained unwavering if Qui-Gon knew then what he knew now.

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He's given me everything. My life as a Jedi. The lessons I needed to learn to become a man.

"And what do I give in return?" He asked softly of the sunburned face staring back at him.

"Obi-Wan, it's time to go."

His Master's call didn't jerk him. A sadness poured through Obi-Wan, seeping into his lungs so that every breath was an ache. "I give him another reason to doubt me."

He began dressing. _Another reason to regret the pity he showed me._

Qui-Gon walked through the gleaming Temple corridors, his apprentice beside him but two steps behind, as was custom.

Today, it felt like much wider a gap.

He knew he should say something. Obi-Wan was rarely the first to break silence, and never did so early into an argument.

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Perhaps he's allowing me to be tortured. The Master considered, in a brief bout of weakness quickly dissolved. _But then, I'm not the only victim._

Immensely troubled by the thought, he redirected his focus to the approaching task. What was there to report concerning Eume'Li? Yes, the jungle area was in serious turmoil and indeed, assistance from the Senate was required.

But what else would be asked of him? Would the Council want to know the details of Obi-Wan's ailment? What would he tell them?

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'It was touch and go for a long while, but Obi-Wan survived and he has successfully recovered.'

That seemed sufficient. After all, his behavior toward the planet's officials might come into question. It would not aid his case in the least to burst out to the revered assembly that Obi-Wan _had _died, for that wicked cluster of seconds, and now every time he glanced at his Padawan, he saw that pale, purpling face, felt an echo of his heart's complete obliteration.

The Council was nothing if not perceptive. Would Master Yoda know, even if he kept those horrors locked in his throat?

There was nowhere to seek solace. Obi-Wan was dealing with enough as it was, and there was still the awful subject of Xanatos to address.

Qui-Gon straightened as they neared the Council Chamber's intimidating doors. A last, personal sentiment crossed his mind. _Gods, but I'm tired._

Knight Tirr had already arrived, and he bowed to Master and apprentice as they reached him.

"Long time no see." He said, the corner of his mouth lifting. "I'm glad to see you in full health again, Obi-Wan."

Obi-Wan tipped his head. "Thank you, Knight Tirr."

Ullo had to ignore the rigid response, because a young Padawan was ushering them inside.

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Master Yoda watched the Jedi's entrance with his heavy-lidded, citrus eyes. Mace Windu and Adi Gallia bordered him, all three level thanks to the levitating cushions on which they sat.

Qui-Gon was surprised and relieved that the report would be given before a small audience, as well as among those he believed to be friends. Perhaps his censure would be slight.

Or, possibly, Yoda did not want him to be reprimanded and humiliated in front of too many of his honored peers.

Either way, he was grateful.

In unison, Master, Knight and Padawan bowed respectfully to the trio. Mace and Adi's gazes were tranquil, patient for the wizened leader to begin.

"Master Jinn, news of the situation on Eume'Li, have you?"

Qui-Gon took a small step forward. "Yes, Master. Our survey of the planet's jungle secured the claims that it was plagued with drought. Most of the animal life had died out and the plant life was well on its way. We were making satisfactory progress toward the capital when," And it was here he paused, taking the bound from routine to abnormal, indifferent to personal, "Obi-Wan fell ill from a source we could not determine."

"Mmm.." The ancient alien gurgled. "Informed us of this, Knight Tirr did. Elaborate, you shall."

Qui-Gon's eyes shifted an inch, to watch the bustling of the city. "He was unusually weary. I monitored him for a time, then decided it would be in his best interest to stop. He grew steadily worse from there, taken with fever and painful reactions to being touched. Our communication hit a glitch," He heard the fast inhale from Ullo, "And our rations were limited. We pressed on. Obi-Wan suffered a seizure and descended to an almost catatonic state.

"He stopped breathing…" _Adhere to an informative tone, _"And I performed resuscitation techniques. They were useless." It was difficult to streamline, to prevent the anger from voicing itself. "Soon his heart had stopped. He was…He was clinically dead…"

"For approximately three standard minutes." Ullo finished for him. He glanced at Qui-Gon, whose very aura beat with thankfulness. "Then, Master Jinn changed Padawan Kenobi's position, and I saw a very small puncture wound, the width of a needle's tip, at the base of his neck.

"I informed Master Jinn and then administered a serum to Padawan Kenobi. Less than a minute passed before his eyes opened. Concurrently," And Ullo could not say it without a smile, "It began to rain in the jungle."

There was a stirring in the eyes of all three Councilors, spots of brightness not present before. "Continue, you will."

Qui-Gon had composed himself, and motioned with a hand that he could reassume his duty. "We came to the Capital and it was decided that Knight Tirr would accompany Obi-Wan to the medical center. There it was ascertained he was bitten by a deadly insect and was treated accordingly. I continued on and met with the Eume'Li officials."

"Padawan Kenobi!" Yoda interrupted shrilly.

Obi-Wan swallowed and bowed. He had been motionless since the session began and was certain his word would not be sought, since his part in the mission had been superficial at best. And counterproductive at worst.

"Yes, Master?"

Clawed hands wrapped around the thick, chewed end of the gimer stick. Yoda rested his chin upon it. "In such dire condition, you have been."

Obi-Wan wasn't sure how to reply to such a statement, so chose to repeat, "Yes, Master."

"And now, how are you?"

"Fine, Master."

"But reported to the Healing Wing, you have not." If there was reprove in the strangled voice, it was incredibly faint. "You must."

Obi-Wan interpreted that as a cue to leave, but as he moved to the door, "But wait, you shall."

The Padawan turned to look into the wrinkled green face of the only other mentor, outside of Qui-Gon, he had ever known. He saw something familiar in its composition. "Stay. More to hear, have you."

The urging was soft, and Obi-Wan felt a tingle in his stomach, the same tingle he detected whenever Yoda chose to be cryptic. He knew the feeling quite well.

"Continue, Master Qui-Gon."

Qui-Gon folded his hands. It would do no good for his apprentice to be present while he was formally corrected for his treatment of the officials. But his name did not hold the weighty esteem of Yoda's. He would have to accept the Master's ruling. "Upon my arrival at the Capital building, I was greeted and scant moments later scolded for my tardiness. The harsh opinion was unchanged even after I explained the reason. I was led to the group of officials, which included a weather specialist. I was then questioned about the rain.

"Apparently, no rainfall was scheduled _at all _in the near future. I was engaged in argument with the men, who simply would not believe me." Qui-Gon stopped then, pursing his lips. He walked closer to the Council members so that he could truly see into their eyes. For the coming confessions, he would need to connect to them on another level. "I wish I could say I am not proud of what happened next, but I must speak with honesty to you, Masters. As the Code dictates. As I feel compelled to do.

"I accused the leaders of Eume'Li of selfish motive. I asked them why they had no technology to track the weather in the jungle, something that would be of great help to them. They evaded my questioning and accused _me _of fingering them unjustly, based on my worry for my apprentice."

Obi-Wan looked at his Master, his heart spurred to a tremble, his cerulean eyes staid.

"They proceeded to say that it was my fault…my sickened Padawan's fault…for what had happened. We were perceived as being unprepared for what threats the jungle could pose.

"I know I should have returned the dialogue to the original topic. But my mindset was totally altered, Masters. It was taking most of my energy to restrain from…" Qui-Gon breathed, "From resorting to violence. I left them then, with the promise of consequence from the Senate."

The silence was pregnant with terrible suspense.

Obi-Wan's body was tight, awaiting the Council's reaction while fighting his own.

Qui-Gon stood steadily before them. Adi's spirit was radiant with her acute, heartfelt compassion. Mace was never open when it came to emotion, not even when it concerned a friend he had made in early childhood, but the lines of his smooth, mahogany face were not so severe.

Yoda sealed his eyes and his loose-skinned ears drew back against his head. "Believe yourself in the right, do you?"

Qui-Gon didn't have to mull it over. "Yes."

"A complaint from the officials on Eume'Li, we have received. Quite angered, they are, by your behavior."

Obi-Wan and Ullo glanced at each other, a panicked worry passing wordlessly between them.

Qui-Gon was untouched by the news. He stood, ready to receive whatever punishment was deemed appropriate.

"But final word, we have." Yoda said warmly.

"After reviewing the circumstances outlined in your report, we choose to," Adi smiled, "Politely overlook your behavior, Master Jinn."

"Considering the stress sustained over many days, and the historical immorality of the Eume'Li government, your reaction was warranted." Mace added. "And frankly, even a slap on the wrist seems unreasonable."

Qui-Gon bowed. "Thank you, Masters."

Ullo and Obi-Wan imitated the respectful gesture.

"Padawan Kenobi, you are now released to report to the Healers." Windu told the apprentice.

Obi-Wan hesitated, sensing outright that there was more to be said, but he could not refuse orders. "Yes, Master." With a glance at Qui-Gon, he walked to the doors, keeping his eyes to the shining, ornately designed floor, so that he would not look back at the man again.

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seraphena Thank you so much.

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Rieyeuxs Thank you for the compliment. I always think I write Obi-Wan too young, so your words were very kind. Thank you for reading.

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Kynstar Hee. I've already read your reply at the other site for this, but thank you. You're such a dedicated reader and friend.

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CYN And after all that drama, the only thing they changed was the name from Writer's Resource to Fan Fiction Resource. Wow. Thanks so much for you reply and congratulations on another amazing chapter of 'Doors'. It made my week.

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Name1 Thanks!

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Isaldaria Thank you.

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Ewan's girl You're so sweet. Thank you for your reply.

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AthenaLeigh Obi-Wan's deeper feelings are something that I really want to address in this sequel, as well as Ullo's. And Qui-Gon's, I guess. Hee hee.

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Restless-soul Thank you!


	2. Chapter Two

Short chapter, I know, and I apologize. More soon!

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Knight Kenobi of Eryn Lasgalen I didn't know which name to address you as, so I just used your login name. Thank you for your reviews on both stories and I'm so glad you're enjoying.

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Shanobi Oh, they have to be dumb sometimes--or else how would we have so much fun with them? Thank you for your support both here and 'there'. I really appreciate it.

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Restless-soul Nothing's easy in life…or so they say. And definitely not in Obi's universe!

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Ewan's girl I hope that I can go in depth with the rift between Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon, as well as what brought them to that point. And I want to do a lot with Ullo too. I just hope I can handle it!

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Athena Leigh Oh yes, I truly hope I avoid crossing the line into sappiness with this fic. I might've been guilty of it in the past, but this fic is going to somewhat dark. Thank you, as always.

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Kynstar You're such a total sweetheart. Thanks for the review!

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Qui-Gon felt the Force presence of Obi-Wan dwindle as he moved toward the Healing Ward. It seemed the others sensed it as well, that they were in fact _waiting_ for him to meld within the distant, communal pulse of the Temple.

Yoda's ever-weary eyes thrilled to wideness before settling into slits again. "Hmm. Disturbed, your apprentice is."

The Master studied the elfish alien intently. He wasn't very surprised. There was a reason Yoda was revered as the most gifted Jed in the Order. For better or worse, he detected emotion that others would dismiss under layers of shielding. In this instance, Qui-Gon was grateful for the old Master's sharpened intellect. Perhaps an outside opinion would help him deal with Obi-Wan's disharmony. _Force let's hope so._

But then, the dominating voice of the Chamber was possessed by Mace Windu, and the smoothly skinned councilor did not speak of Obi-Wan's current condition.

"Master Qui-Gon, Knight Ullo, you say that the rain was unscheduled when it fell in the Eume'Li jungle?"

"Yes, Master." Both replied.

"And the rainfall coincided with Obi-Wan's resuscitation?"

Ullo was as solemn as Qui-Gon had seen the man during their short but intense friendship. "It did. At the same moment he took a breath, the rain began to pour. If I may say so Masters, it was the most incredible phenomenon I have ever witnessed."

"Heard of this, I have." Yoda drummed his fingers slowly against his mottled cane. "But not in many, many years."

The tenure of the Master's memory surpassed any other creature within the Temple several times over. Eight centuries deepened the creases in the loose green skin, rimmed the lime eyes in withered sockets--and gave Yoda the life experience rivaled only by immortal races.

What 'many, many years' meant to Qui-Gon and Ullo could be in tremendous contrast to what it meant to Yoda.

"Strong in the Force, is Obi-Wan. Purely strong in the Light."

Qui-Gon's eyes stared sightlessly at the tiled floor. His heart was immersed in the thunder of the moment, afraid and intrigued by the tone the room had undertaken. Obi-Wan was a powerful member of the Jedi. Irreplaceable. But that, Qui-Gon already knew, a stance solidified forever by the close call on the jungle's bitter, cold ground.

The thin lips parted once more. "Sometimes, grasp to the living, the dying must. A reach for vibrancy in the dark."

Qui-Gon blinked. "The jungle--bonded with Obi-Wan?"

"Mmm. Among thick shadows, a beacon, the Light is. The Light in young Obi-Wan, the jungle's weakening aura clung to." Yoda's expression softened. "For in peril, needed strength, the jungle did. The trees, the birds. Yes. The earth itself."

Ullo frowned in quiet confusion. "And when Obi-Wan died?"

"More than mournful, was the corpse around you."

Qui-Gon's mind was speeding along with his frenzied heartbeat. Such a situation, he had never entertained! "When Obi-Wan's spirit was revitalized--"

"Like taking a breath for two, he was. A gulp of life for the jungle." The faintest of smiles. "The rain."

For one rumored to have immovable resolve, Qui-Gon was worried his knees would give out. He and Ullo had been suspicious of the hold Eume'Li was having on them, especially Obi-Wan. But they never discussed the possibility of…what was considered the impossible. It was almost laughable.

Yet he could not muster much mirth. He knew what if felt like to hold his Padawan, dead and limp. _Nothing _about the Eume'Li mission could be taken lightly.

"We believe this should be documented, Qui-Gon. As an example of the superior abilities of the Light Side of the Force. We dismissed Obi-Wan because we didn't want to overwhelm him with this new information. Not after his brush with.." Mace hesitated, seeing the strained look Qui-Gon carried. "Not after this ordeal."

"We believe he _should _be told," Adi continued, "But perhaps in a less…intimidating arena. After enough time has passed, I'm sure you can handle the duty, Qui-Gon."

Qui-Gon nodded. "I will."

"Good." Yoda gurgled.

"In that case, the report is complete." Mace stood, along with his compatriots. "You are dismissed."

Qui-Gon and Ullo bowed, their robes swishing against the floor softly.

"Stay you will, Qui-Gon." Yoda called.

Ullo offered an encouraging smile, a silent murmur of 'good luck', then headed the trio of Jedi out the double doors.


	3. Chapter Three

Thank you to **M Art**, **firewingz**, **Pug**, **Shanobi**, **ewan's girl**, **Kynstar **and **Athena Leigh **for your lovely comments and support. Of all my fics, this has been the most challenging by far. Inspiration has been pretty much nonexistent for over a month, but I'm going to try to plow through it today, without much of a plan. Wish me luck!

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Obi-Wan heaved a breath before entering the Healing Ward. It was an unnecessary visit, of course. A precautionary measure that would accomplish nothing, save waste his time.

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And just what would I be doing with this time? Dodging Qui-Gon?

Sinking back into the discontented shadows coiled within him, the apprentice met the receptionist at the front desk.

A fresh-faced Healer with a slim, flaxen Padawan braid dangling at her ear greeted him. "Good morning, Padawan Kenobi. You're here for your checkup?"

Obi-Wan nodded. "Yes."

The girl glanced with keenly trained eyes at a data pad, tracing her fingers down a column until she found his name, then highlighted it with a quick touch.

"Currently most of the healers are attending a new technique-intensive seminar. And since you're not an emergency case," She glanced up with a small smile, "One of our programmed physicians will be directing your checkup. Room 2A. Right down that hallway, Padawan Kenobi."

A half-bow. "Thank you." He followed the direction she had pointed toward. _Well, there's a bit of luck. _'Programmed physicians' was a technical term for med droids and to Obi-Wan, that was a purely beautiful beacon of light. He never relished being prodded both mentally and physically by the Temple healers. There were two breeds he had encountered during his numerous visits. The stern healers that didn't much care if their instruments were stored on Hoth and lowered Obi-Wan's temperature to a shivering degree with every touch.

And then there were the fussing healers. They were the preferable of the two, displaying compassion almost to a fault. As nice as it was to be worried over, he didn't need to be lectured on the dangers of running alongside a swimming pool or performing certain katas blindfolded.

That was what his Master was for.

The thought garnered a deep ache, as he expected it to. Obi-Wan started to straighten his tunics, then wondered why he bothered, and entered the examining room.

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Once silence had fallen in the absence of the other Jedi, Yoda turned to Qui-Gon, his small body leaning against the gimer stick. The wide eyes were fastened to the taller, broader Master, moving down his form with deliberate slowness.

Qui-Gon was well accustomed to being under the renowned sage's appraisal. Normally, he would not be irked by such focused attention. But the very foundations of his connection with Obi-Wan had been uprooted ,as well as a few of his own, personal truths.

The Master was adult enough to admit it. He was antsy.

Finally, Yoda settled his eyes on the other's face. "Surprised, you were, by the incident on Eume'Li." When Qui-Gon didn't answer, the Master clarified, "The rain."

"Yes," Qui-Gon replied, without the slightest measure of delay. A smile ghosted his tired face. "Weren't you?"

The clawed hands drummed, warring with the glimmer of pale jade eyes. "Not so much as you, I believe."

Qui-Gon chuckled. "Tell me, Master. Does _anything _surprise you?" He watched morning projected as pallid shafts on the floor, where a few moments earlier, his Padawan had stood. "Before, during the meeting, you said he was disturbed." The Master locked eyes with his smaller counterpart, and the humor was but a memory, fled quickly from his voice. "What did you mean?"

Yoda saw the desolation drawn in deepening lines on Qui-Gon's face. "Frown too much, you do. A habit passed on to your apprentice." He poked a stubby finger against the man's forehead. "Ugly habit."

And for some reason, the gentle prod brought a moist sheen to the towering Master's eyes. "I know," He practically gasped, "But what can I do? I can't rewrite the past, Master."

The ancient little alien captured Qui-Gon's massive hand. "Take quill in hand for today, you can. And the day after, if strong for your apprentice, you can be. Ready, the page is, for your inscriptions.

"It is your decision."

Qui-Gon looked around the familiar room while the advice registered. "I lost him. For those minutes on Eume'Li." He sighed. "So it's possible for me to lose him again. What if I'm _not _strong enough?"

A slight smile creased the sagging skin around the citrus eyes. "Never know what good weight we can shoulder, if we never try."

"He told Knight Tirr that I have placed him in the shadow of…of Xanatos."

"Mmm." Yoda's ears drew back against his wrinkled head. "If so, it is a tragic darkness to live in. But only you know what is true, Master Qui-Gon. Only you can sate him."

Qui-Gon's fingers curled in. "He didn't come to me. After our talk in the hospital--he told a near stranger what he felt, instead of his own Master. I suppose that speaks for itself."

"Speaks of Obi-Wan's nature, it does." Yoda corrected, with tenderness. "His great reluctance to upset you."

"Well," Qui-Gon blew out a breath, "He's gone against his nature this time around then."

The Master hobbled closer, and the daylight wove through the white wisps of hair on his head. "Indeed. Upset, you most surely are. And he knows it."

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